DEALING WITH DISAPPOINTMENT: Simple ways to start moving forward

I looked at this picture and first saw 'disappointment' at the base!

We have all had those moments;

When it didn't turn out as you planned or imagined,

When years, passions, dreams invested are now a lifeless stump,

When you invested your heart and expected much more but there is just an empty space.

When working or waiting, pursuing, persevering and believing yielded an empty hand...

When you just got it wrong and the mess is unavoidable.

In that dead end space there is still growth!

Sometimes it comes forth out of the deepest despair.

Here are a few simple ways to navigate the inner conflict and take steps forward;

1. Be Kind!

It is easier to judge, crticize and dwell on the mistakes or losses. Be kind to yourself and to others. Guard your words! What you release is what takes root.

2. Feel and Let Go!

Give yourself time and permission to feel the weight of the disappointing reality vs your higher expectations. It is OK to grieve and express anger, betrayal, loss, or sadness. This is actually essential to process and make sense of what has happened. BUT be careful not to linger in the hurt experience too long as it can suck you down into a constricting pipe. Instead dig for the important lessons you need to understand in order to grow.

3. Assess your Mindset

The thoughts and conversations you replay over and over either become a web that entangles or a catapault to propel wisdom into action. Check what is on repeat in your head; does it help or does it hinder?

4. Take Ownership

How often do we shift blame or focus elsewhere to avoid responsibility? Others are easy targets of our misplaced regret and mismanaged emotions. Even if the experience was not our fault we still have important choices; to either react in the moment or mindfully respond wisely and mercifully.

If we messed up it is our duty to be accountable, say sorry and as much is as possible find a way to reconcile and restore.

Both require courage, humility, and character.

This is the real test to pass for maturity.

5. Choose Forgiveness

I have learned forgiveness is not an emotion. It is a choice I make over and over to extend my heart's capacity regardless of how I feel or the rushing thoughts flooding my head. I choose it in each moment; one small action that forces realignment and shifts me out of myself to a place of serving again. Another small action often follows gathering momentum until my emotions and heart eventually catch up.

6. Be Accountable

Find someone who doesn't just console you with what you want to hear but asks the uncomfortable hard questions. We need these people to sharpen and keep us on track. Invite another pair of trusted eyes to look with you for greater clarity.

Act justly, love mercy, walk humbly! Micah 6:8

The stump is the place of breakage and slicing but it is also a wide platform for change and new perspective if we will walk out the road intentionally. The photo is clear the stump of disppointment is not the end of the story.

There are seeds you cannot yet see waiting to spring up,

Defeat is another opportunity to prove that failure counts too....

Life unexpectedly takes root again out of the failures!

"...and hope does not disappoint us..." -Romans 5:5